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The
Agoraphobia Family Environment
by Stephen Price
The development of agoraphobia can be made more likely by a
person’s family environment. The following elements or
occurrences within an individual’s family contribute to the
development of the personality traits behind agoraphobia.
Parent who models anxiety
Role modeling by a parent can have a powerful influence on a
child. If one or both parents model anxious personality
traits, the child is likely to develop them.
Critical parent
Children with overly critical parents who place unrealistic
expectations on them are more likely to become
perfectionists. That’s because children are prone to
internalizing (or taking on as their own) the expectations
of significant adults in their lives. Once expectations are
internalized, they can continue into a person’s adult life.
Many adults with agoraphobia, whether they know it or not,
are still striving to meet the expectations their parents
set for them as children.
Overprotective parent
Overprotective parents shield their children from life's
hardships, acting as if their children couldn't handle life
on their own. Overprotection on the part of the parent
teaches a child that taking risks in life is too dangerous
and that risks should be avoided. It also teaches the child
that he or she is fragile and not equipped to face
challenges independently. As a result, children of
overprotective parents are likely to fear taking risks and
feel anxiety and uncertainty about themselves when faced
with challenges.
Approval based on performance
Parents who give approval based on performance only show
approval for their child when he or she does something that
pleases them. This type of parent does not make a clear
distinction between what the child does and the child's
worth as a person. Children with parents who base approval
on performance may also grow up failing to make this
critical distinction. They may feel they must always perform
well to be a valuable person. This will undoubtedly lead to
the anxiety that comes from always having to achieve
something to maintain a sense of worth.
Parents who base approval on performance and also hold
perfectionistic standards do their children an even greater
disservice. Not only do their children learn that they have
to perform well to be loved, they learn that they must
perform perfectly. When a child feels like his or her worth
is riding on being perfect, this can lead to a lot of
performance anxiety. It can also lead to the fear of losing
the love and approval of significant others.
Rigid family rules
Children who grow up in families with overly strict rules
tend to become black-and-white thinkers, which makes
agoraphobia more likely. As adults, they may end up creating
their own set of rigid rules about the way things "should"
be and experience undue anxiety when these standards are not
met.
Rigid belief systems
Children who grow up in families that hold rigid belief
systems also tend to become black-and-white thinkers because
parents with rigid beliefs usually model this type of
thinking.
Suppression of feelings
When children grow up in families where they are taught that
it is not okay to express feelings (like being told not to
cry or not to feel a certain way), they can become prone to
holding their feelings in as adults. Parents may teach a
child that it is not okay to express feelings in several
ways: 1) by telling the child directly not to feel a certain
way, 2) by ignoring the child's feelings, or 3) by reacting
with violence or anger when the child expresses feelings.
Children with parents who teach that it is not okay to
express emotions tend to become adults with pent up
emotions, putting them at risk for anxiety and panic.
Alcoholism, physical abuse, or emotional abuse
Children from homes with alcoholism or abuse may develop
anxiety that comes from having an unstable emotional
environment. They are more likely to be emotionally unstable
as adults and are more prone to developing agoraphobia.
Separation from parents
Children who are separated from their parents for long
periods of time without knowing why often develop anxiety
over separation and loss. This may happen if a parent is
sick or in the hospital for a long time, goes on long
business trips, ignores the child for long periods, gets
divorced, or dies.
Having to play the parent role too early
Children who are forced into the parent role with younger
siblings at an early age because of a parent being sick,
busy, or absent may develop a rigid set of rules for
themselves in order to survive. This is a coping mechanism
for having adult responsibilities before they are
developmentally prepared to handle them. In adulthood, this
can lead to many of the anxious personality traits that
contribute to agoraphobia such as black-and-white thinking,
a high need for control, perfectionism, and unrealistic
expectations.
The elements or occurrences in the family environment just
discussed do not cause anxious personalities or agoraphobia
in all cases. However, the more of these factors a person
experiences early in life, the more likely they are to
develop personality traits that set the stage for
agoraphobia.
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